I Was the Last One To Go

Backgrounder: “I like cleaning up after parties and am usually the last one to go home. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.” gaharrison

I Was the Last One To Go

1. You called me last week, said, “Come over at nine.”
And if I had time, call a few friends of mine.
We planned to stay in, maybe watch some TV,
But after my friends left, I said, “Please dance with me.”

Chorus:

I was the last one to go, I was the last one to go,
We had the house to ourselves, no more movies to show.
You said, “Sure, we’ll dance when we put things away,
I was the last one to go, after you had your way.


2. We cleaned up the kitchen and filled up the sink,
These dishes won’t take long, I started to think.
But for each one I washed you brought even more,
Then you found all the dishes I hid behind the door.

3. I poured more hot water and started to clean,
I rolled up my sleeves, I was a scrubbing machine.
You said you’d be waiting for me to get done,
But I found you asleep as up came the sun.

4. I gave you a shake and you looked up at me
And said, “Who are you?” I said, “Hey, it’s me.”
“The last dish has been washed, and of that there’s no doubt.”
“Thanks a heck of a lot,” you said. “Now let yourself out.”

I was the last one to go, I was the last one to go,
We had the house to ourselves, no more movies to show.
You said, “Sure, we’ll dance when we put things away,
I was the last one to go, after you had your way.

GAH

Come On Over, I'm Over You

Backgrounder: “My wife and I have gone through hard times but never hard enough to end in divorce. Thirty-nines years later I still say, she’s a keeper. Her thoughts on the matter? I’m not exactly sure, but I bet it's half good. This song was written as a bit of fun about an unfunny topic.” gaharrison

Come On Over, I'm Over You

I get the pet dog, you get the cat,
I get the pet mouse, you get the rat.
I get the parakeet, you get the cage,
I get the parsley, you get the sage.
I get the whiskey I like to drink,
You get the Tupperware under the sink.
I packed all our stuff, divided by two.
So, come on over, I'm over you.

Chorus:

Come on over, I said we’re through.
Come on over, it’s sad but true.
I'm over you and your cold embrace,
I'm over you and your hard-luck face,
Come on over, see my new place.
And, pick up your boxes, I need the space.

I get the car, you get the truck,
I get the chicken, you get the duck.
I get the pots, you get the pans,
I get the blue box, you get the cans.
I get the couch with the pull-out bed,
You get the twelve-speed we kept in the shed.
I packed all our stuff, divided by two.
So, come on over, I'm over you.


[“Halfa this is yours too. Come on over”]

I get the coffee, you get the tea,
I get the radio, you get the TV.
I get the shoes, you get the clothes,
I get the garden, you get the hose.
I get the dress shirts and all of my pants,
You get the song, you get the dance.
I packed all our stuff, divided by two.
So, come on over, I'm over you.

I get some money back, you get your purse,
I get my freedom, you get the curse.
I get the roof tops you get the floor,
I get my leg room you get the door.
I get the high road, a bottle of wine,
You get the low road and half of what's mine.
I packed all our stuff, divided by two.
So, come on over, I'm over you.

Optional -

I get the helo pad, you get the yacht,
I get the gold bars, you get the stock.
I get the time-share in Boca Raton,
You get the mansion, the five acre lawn.
I get the Bentley, the cottage in France,
You get the beach house, the long picket fence.
Whatever we dreamed I divided by two.
Now, come on over, I'm over you.

GAH

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Yeah, like the Bentley is ever going to happen.

Click here to read my latest column in The Londoner

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Blue Moon

Backgrounder: “I wrote this song while going through a ‘Bill Monroe bluegrass’ phase. All I need to do now is learn how to play the mandolin or banjo.” gaharrison

Blue Moon

1. Borrowed two dollars from my mother,
borrowed five dollars from my pa.
Said the money was for groceries.
Instead, I spent it at the mall.
Borrowed ten dollars from my sister,
borrowed twenty from my gal,
Said the money paid my heat bill.
Instead, went drinking with a pal.

Chorus:

2. Blue moon shining in my window,
blue moon shining on the wall.
I’m sitting all alone at midnight,
Wondering why folks never call.
Blue moon shining in my window,
blue moon shining on the wall,
I lay down thinking of my loved ones,
they don't pay me mind at all.


["Blue moon shining in my window...": GAH]

3. Borrowed fifty from my brother,
borrowed a 'C' from Uncle Jack,
Said I had to buy a new suit,
had a job down at the track.
Borrowed two hundred from my grandma,
the same from a guy I met,
Said I had a sure-fire venture,
Translated means one final bet.

4. That last guy came back for his money,
I said, "I'm tapped out, my son."
He tapped me once, he tapped me twice,
he tapped me three times with his gun.
Borrowed two dollars from my mother,
borrowed five dollars from my pa.
Said, "I need a blood transfusion."
Haven't seen them since the fall.

Optional:

5. I lay here thinking of my loved ones,
they haven’t come by for awhile.
The nurses think that I’m an orphan,
they don’t ever see me smile.
I guess you shouldn’t borrow money,
not if you want to have a friend
When you’re walking through the valley,
when you’re getting near the end.

gah

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